Language quietly shapes how we see our work, our teams and our partners. Yet most diminishing language slips in unnoticed.
In Dutch it is remarkably easy to make something smaller by adding “je” or “tje”. An auto (car) becomes an autootje (little car). Harmless enough, perhaps even charming. But when an entrepreneur refers to their bedrijf (company) as a bedrijfje (little company), something shifts. The business is subtly reduced. The ambition sounds smaller. The seriousness fades.
This pattern appears in more corporate forms as well. How would you prefer to be described inside your organisation: an FTE, staff, an employee, personnel? Each term carries a different weight. Referring to someone as an FTE frames them as a unit of capacity, interchangeable and transactional. It strips away individuality and contribution. Language like that erodes respect, even if unintentionally.
And respect is not cosmetic. It influences performance.
The same applies to alliances. Do you genuinely see the other organisation as a partner, or are they in reality a supplier that you label as a partner? I recently saw a LinkedIn post announcing a tender for new suppliers, followed in the same sentence by enthusiasm about collaborating with these partners. That contradiction reveals a deeper confusion. A supplier is selected through procurement logic. A partner is chosen through strategic alignment and mutual value creation. If you mean partner, act like it.
The reverse can also be true. A client once told me that competitors kept calling him a partner, as if the label alone would justify selling him more. Words without intent undermine credibility.
Language not only shapes how others feel, it shapes how you think. Do you speak about your alliance as they and them, or as we and us? Inclusive language changes behaviour. It signals shared ownership. It strengthens accountability. It reinforces joint success.
The challenge is that organisational language becomes habitual. It embeds itself in culture. You stop hearing it.
A simple exercise can sharpen awareness. Keep a visible sheet of paper nearby for a week. Each time you notice diminishing or excluding language, write it down. Next to it, write the alternative that better reflects respect and shared ambition. The act of noticing is transformative. Over time you will hear yourself earlier and adjust more naturally.
Language is a leadership tool. Use it deliberately.